More about cancer
I drifted in and out of consciousness for most of that day and dozed intermittently through the night, the next morning I was awake and alert. I was absolutely starving so when breakfast came I ate everything that was offered to me. Later the doctor came round and had a look at my mastectomy scar and nodded knowingly telling me that if I wanted I could go home that day. I was exceedingly pleased by this news as I'd rather do my recovering at home than being stuck in a hospital. When hubby came to the hospital I told him the good news, then phoned my mum, who lives 50 miles away. She jumped in her car but alas got caught in traffic so we ordered a taxi to take us home. Mum wasn't best pleased by this, but I just wanted out of the hospital, I'm not the best patient in the world and hospitals are not the best places to be, I find them depressing at best. Once home I felt a lot better, I sat on the settee whilst hubby fussed over me and mum arrived not long after. At this point things got a tad out of hand, mum wanted to help but in all truthfulness there was nothing for her to do, I felt awful about this as she'd been a tower of strength and it felt as if I was cutting her off, the truth is, I just wanted to be alone with hubby for a bit, he too had been through hell and back and I just wanted to sit with him and have a cuddle.
That night I was a bit scared of sleeping in my bed as I had a drain fitted in the wound and was afraid of either ripping it out or lying on it so I slept on the settee. I had to order hubby to bed as he wanted to stay with me but after threatening dire consequences if he didn't, he obeyed.
The next day I tried the exercises I'd been given to do and was quite surprised, they weren't easy but neither were they as hard as I expected. The day was spent being waited on hand and foot by hubby and various friends came to visit, with flowers and grapes. Emptying the drain was a bit yukky but it had to be done. Hubby stayed at home for a few days and then went back to work with some trepidation. I promised him that I would call at the slightest sign of anything, but I didn't see the point in him staying at home, by this time it was obvious I was going to be ok.
The next thing was the waiting, waiting to find out whether the cancer had spread or not, I tried not to worry about it, but my mind nibbled at it constantly. We had one visit to the hospital so the nurse could check my scar and she pronounced it 'coming along nicely'.
At last the appointment with the surgeon came and hubby, my mum and myself trooped into the little room and waited for the surgeon. He came in and shook our hands and waffled on for about 10 minutes, by which time I was ready to strangle him. Then he told me what I had been waiting for....He said they had got all the cancer and that my lymph nodes were clear. He then told me that I would need chemo and hormone therapy, but these were standard and just a precaution.
To say I was relieved doesn't even cover it, I don't think I will ever be able to describe how I felt. We all left the hospital walking on air and went to pizza hut. My two sons were digging out my front garden for me that day and I'd promised to feed them. Whilst we waited for the pizzas we went to toys r us and my mum bought me a Winnie the pooh balloon!
We got home with pizzas and I told the lads the news and once more there were hugs all round and a few tears.
I haven't mentioned my lads much in this, but they too have been towers of strength, my youngest who is 18 isn't given to emotional displays but showed his support in small ways, giving me a hug now and again and making me tea (to which I am a hopeless addict). I know he was as scared as I was and he deserves a medal for holding it together when a lot of lads his age would have fallen apart.
My oldest lad lives with his wife on the other side of town and he too deserves a medal, throughout this he never wavered in his belief that I would be ok and was always cheerful. Without him I don't think I would have retained my sense of humour.
Thats about it really, no dramatics, no woe woe thrice woe, losing a breast is not as traumatic as I thought it would be. Admittedly I'm one of the lucky ones, a quick chop...Some chemo and hopefully all will be well. I haven't felt diminished by having just one boob, my life hasn't changed in any fundamental way and I'm still a woman. I'm grateful that I'll be around for a few more years certainly but apart from that....life goes on.
I wish I had some profound piece of wisdom to pass on to any cancer sufferers out there, but alas, I don't. Just remember that your families love you dearly and they are there for you, don't feel guilty about imposing on them, because they are more than happy to be imposed upon!
Oh...and one last thing.....Be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That night I was a bit scared of sleeping in my bed as I had a drain fitted in the wound and was afraid of either ripping it out or lying on it so I slept on the settee. I had to order hubby to bed as he wanted to stay with me but after threatening dire consequences if he didn't, he obeyed.
The next day I tried the exercises I'd been given to do and was quite surprised, they weren't easy but neither were they as hard as I expected. The day was spent being waited on hand and foot by hubby and various friends came to visit, with flowers and grapes. Emptying the drain was a bit yukky but it had to be done. Hubby stayed at home for a few days and then went back to work with some trepidation. I promised him that I would call at the slightest sign of anything, but I didn't see the point in him staying at home, by this time it was obvious I was going to be ok.
The next thing was the waiting, waiting to find out whether the cancer had spread or not, I tried not to worry about it, but my mind nibbled at it constantly. We had one visit to the hospital so the nurse could check my scar and she pronounced it 'coming along nicely'.
At last the appointment with the surgeon came and hubby, my mum and myself trooped into the little room and waited for the surgeon. He came in and shook our hands and waffled on for about 10 minutes, by which time I was ready to strangle him. Then he told me what I had been waiting for....He said they had got all the cancer and that my lymph nodes were clear. He then told me that I would need chemo and hormone therapy, but these were standard and just a precaution.
To say I was relieved doesn't even cover it, I don't think I will ever be able to describe how I felt. We all left the hospital walking on air and went to pizza hut. My two sons were digging out my front garden for me that day and I'd promised to feed them. Whilst we waited for the pizzas we went to toys r us and my mum bought me a Winnie the pooh balloon!
We got home with pizzas and I told the lads the news and once more there were hugs all round and a few tears.
I haven't mentioned my lads much in this, but they too have been towers of strength, my youngest who is 18 isn't given to emotional displays but showed his support in small ways, giving me a hug now and again and making me tea (to which I am a hopeless addict). I know he was as scared as I was and he deserves a medal for holding it together when a lot of lads his age would have fallen apart.
My oldest lad lives with his wife on the other side of town and he too deserves a medal, throughout this he never wavered in his belief that I would be ok and was always cheerful. Without him I don't think I would have retained my sense of humour.
Thats about it really, no dramatics, no woe woe thrice woe, losing a breast is not as traumatic as I thought it would be. Admittedly I'm one of the lucky ones, a quick chop...Some chemo and hopefully all will be well. I haven't felt diminished by having just one boob, my life hasn't changed in any fundamental way and I'm still a woman. I'm grateful that I'll be around for a few more years certainly but apart from that....life goes on.
I wish I had some profound piece of wisdom to pass on to any cancer sufferers out there, but alas, I don't. Just remember that your families love you dearly and they are there for you, don't feel guilty about imposing on them, because they are more than happy to be imposed upon!
Oh...and one last thing.....Be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by shezzy's sanitarium at 6:12 PM
1 comments
